wait.
My mind is buzzing. good is not the word i would use. actually it feels like im being prodded along by some invisible force. im not quite sure what this is...
.. the last three mornings ive woken up at 230. wide awake, no way was there any chance of going back to sleep. my thoughts are focused on a house. and big dreams of building parrot aviaries, coffee shops etc. my pirate business will be amazing. yet as i sit here, with only my thoughts able to move, i scold my other self. and yet, comforted. as this person has been gone far too long.
so apparently i have a house in the works, and am already thinking of building outdoor enclosures for the birds. ones like this:
Red and 42 would agree with me. 7 would declare that hell will swallow me whole and that i couldnt do much more that crawl out of bed in the morning let alone buy a house.
we will see. for now, im going to try and clean. thsi energy is unsettling. its not my own. a negative drive with tones of sorrow amplified. anotherwords , tasmanian devil going at the speed of light only to dig itself into the ground.
NO!
youre going the wrong way!
i want to go UP. Up Up Up!!!
you have this tone about you, an odd air of importance and utter self loathing all rolled into a nice package.
self destruction cannot be an option.
No comments:
Post a Comment